A GIRL’S PRAYER

Lord,

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who’s not a creep.
One who’s handsome, smart and strong,
One whose willy’s thick and long.

One who thinks before he speaks,
When promises to call, he won’t wait weeks.
I pray that he is gainfully employed,
And when I spend his cash, won’t be annoyed.

Pulls out my chair, and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh, send me a man who will make love to my mind,
Knows just what to say, when I ask, “How big’s my behind?”

One who’ll make love ’til my body’s a-twitching,
In the hall, the loo, the garden and kitchen!
I pray that this man will love me no end,
And never attempts to shag my best friend.

And as I kneel and pray by my bed,
I look at the wanker you sent me instead.

Amen.

A BOY’S PRAYER

Lord,

I pray for a lady with big tits.

Amen.